Last month, I came across a intriguing story on the internet titled, “I wish you enough.” A father and daughter were saying goodbye to one another for what they knew to be the last time they would see each other (due to the father’s failing health and the daughters distant living). It was a “forever goodbye”. The father said to the daughter, “I wish you enough.” Longish story shortish, upon further inspection by way of a conversation with the father, the author of the story discovered just exactly what the father meant by “I wish you enough.” He had never heard it before, and neither had I before I read the article.
Wishing someone enough is wanting them to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them.
‘I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.
I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.
I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.
I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.
I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
I wish you enough “Hello’s” to get you through the final “Goodbye.”‘
I wish you enough. After experiencing my first few mornings at El Hospital de Niños, there have been times when I’ve felt like I’ve been stripped to nothing. Physically, Mentally, Emotionally.
Physically— No readers, I’m not naked, but I have a specific shirt I must wear along with pants and closed toed shoes (and socks.. not a socks fan besides red sox baseball caps because I think their symbol is cute), no nail polish (really big deal for me), no rings, nothing on my arms (besides my watch, phew), no nosering (another huge deal, rents were happy), and my hair back from my face. I basically stand there, clinging to my individualism as its wrapped around my head in the form of a permitted cheetah headband, physically feeling like I’m not wearing enough.
Mentally— The Spanish, yall. WOW my past Spanish teachers, family, and life supporters (you know who you are) would be proud because >this girl’s< Spanish has improved immensely. HOWEVER immense improvement, on the scale of 1 to fluent, means nothing when I’m trying to tell the nurse that a little girls tube on her face looks disconnected and I don’t know if that’s bad, or when I’m given a hospital tour containing health words I wouldn’t even understand in English, or when a lady thinks I’m trying to hide from volunteering in the basement(?) but really I’m just heading back to the office from the Ropería (laundry room) because I wanted to say bye to the people I’m obsessed with there before leaving early to catch the public bus to make it back to afternoon classes on time…!!!!!!!! Those moments when you can’t communicate, and you just mentally feel like its not enough.
Emotionally– I am not good with sicknesses. I am not good with diseases. I’m not good with grief. I’m not good with despair. When I’m literally happy all the time, it’s because I’m literally happy all the time. But sometimes, when I see children are rushed through the halls on hospital beds and a semi-circle of panicked doctors, when my tour guide tells me on the fifth floor that the right side is “where they bring the bodies”, or when every turned corner reveals a parents faces with nothing but worry in their eyes, I stand there wondering if there is enough within me emotionally to do this.
I wish you enough. This phrase really is beautiful to me. Often times we wish for people to become prosperous and make a lot of money or we wish for loved ones to have more than they could ever imagine. But for what? They don’t need that to sustain life, and those things only block their sights from the beauty of what really matters. Those extra things are obstacles between where we are and what God has placed in our lives to give us true, undeniable joy. God provides for us, and He gives us enough.
I have enough. In my life, I am so fully and bountifully blessed. It’s overwhelming. In one of my first blog posts I remember writing my cup runneth over. The same is true for my experience at El Hospital de Niños. I have enough and that’s all I need; physically, mentally, emotionally. Physically– Let’s be real. I don’t need that nose ring, I am blessed to have warm socks to wear (who remembers “Paved Paradise“?). One could argue that I physically have too much as I tower over the ticos and blind them with my blonde hair, wooing the laundry room men into being my Valentine. Mentally– Are you kidding me? Maybe I don’t know certain terms, and maybe that old lady is still mad at me (or whatever she was), but today I translated an English prayer into Spanish so that Mariangel and her Grandma could understand the meaning behind it. We had a little devotion and it was an amazing moment. And if I can talk to Isaac’s uncle/not sure/grandpa Henri for two hours about Nicaragua, then I think I know enough. Emotionally– Yeah, it’s hard. And it’s going keep being hard. But today, I had two “forever goodbyes” and they were GOODbyes because two of my favorite kids are getting discharged from the hospital. Gloria a Dios!
To all of my readers, I wish you enough.